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Surviving a Zombie Apocalypse

by Jennie Hopkins
Zombie Apocalypse Survival Tips

Ok, ok, this zombie survival series isn’t all just jokes you know; let’s get serious and forget about the zombies for a second. When the zombies hit the fan, things can go downhill and fast. They say that any civilization is only 2 or 3 meals away from a revolution, and this is more so when the zombies are trying to make a meal out of you.

Whether it’s civil unrest, riots, infrastructure meltdown or, well, zombies, you’ll need to know how to manage on your own. In other words, you’ll need to be able to unplug from the Matrix and get by without the usual things a member of a well-functioning society takes for granted.

First thing – upskill

Do you know how to purify water?

Disinfect a wound?

Skin a rabbit?

Why the hell not?

Modern living makes it easy to take for granted a consumer lifestyle where you don’t have to do much of anything to stay alive. But should zombies overrun your city and the power and water shuts off, that’ll change quickly.

Are you prepared?

While things are still OK, learn some skills that’ll come in handy later on. Keep super fit and lift heavy (those deadlifts might be useful, if you know what I mean).

Learn some basic first aid skills. Learn a little about foraging for wild food in your area or take up a hunting hobby. Do sprints. Take a leadership course so you can rally your team when the time comes. Study war history. Learn basic anatomy and how to fix a car. Learn to sew – either torn clothing or shredded skin. Learn to use some kind of weapon.

Be independent

One day without water and electricity means everyone is grumpy and smells bad. Two days starts to look a bit worse. By three days, you have a real problem on your hands. Avoid this mess by thinking about upgrading your home and lifestyle so it can function even while civilization is crumbling all around you.

Think about switching to solar power, saving rain water or using a borehole, and buy some appropriate generators. Keep gas canisters along with the rest of your supplies and look into CB radios or walkie talkies.

Look at your everyday routines and ask – how would this situation look if you had no power, water or sanitation plus a zombie trying to bust down your front door? Now imagine all the things you’d need to make that situation a bit less crappy.

Make friends

Just about the only resource that will still be plentiful is the help of others. Don’t be that guy who only introduces himself to his neighbor for the first time when he’s looking for a place to hide from zombies. Be friendly.

Communities are stronger than individuals. Keep abreast of gossip. Pool skills and resources. Not to be funny, but at the very least you’ll only have to outrun the slowest member in an emergency…

Zombie Apocalypse Survival Checklist

  • Ok, what about communication? What will you do after the last percent of charge disappears on your phone?
  • Transport – get a bike or a vehicle that can run on a variety of fuels if you’re feeling fancy. Your bus pass will probably be useless.
  • Think power and water. If you can’t secure water, do you have a way to purify the water you find?
  • Who do you know that’s good in a crisis? Can you bake them a cake or something?

– 4-Part Zombie Survival Series –

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Surviving a Zombie Apocalypse

time to read: 3 min